The Definition of Hospitality (and Why It’s Harder Than You Think)

Simon Elliot
23 hours ago
5 min read

Ask a room full of hospitality professionals a simple question, “What’s the definition of hospitality?” and you might expect a confident, unified answer. Instead, you might get blank looks…followed by a dozen or more different responses.

Recently, I experienced exactly this during a workshop where we were exploring the meaning of hospitality. As the conversation went around the room, it struck me that everyone had a slightly different interpretation. Some talked about service. Others about food, amenities, design, or atmosphere.

All valid. But none quite captured the whole picture.

Around the same time, I came across a short post on Instagram that stuck with me:

Good salespeople sell features.
Great salespeople sell benefits.
Super salespeople sell feelings.

That simple idea suddenly reframed the conversation for me.

Because perhaps the true definition of hospitality isn’t about what we provide, it’s about how people feel as a result.

Looking Beyond Hotels and Restaurants

During the workshop, we were asked another question: “Which organizations deliver the best hospitality experiences?”

Naturally, my mind first went to some of my favorite hotels and restaurants. But then I found myself thinking about companies outside what is traditionally termed as hospitality.

Take Apple as an example: Walking into an Apple Store is rarely stressful. The products are intuitive, the environment is calm, and if something goes wrong you can walk up to the Genius Bar and speak with someone who helps get your digital life back on track. The experience is easy to use, easy to consume, and reassuring.

But more importantly, it’s about how being an Apple customer makes you feel: confident, supported, and in control.

Then I thought about Mini: Few car brands celebrate personalization quite like Mini. With countless configuration options, owners can design something that feels uniquely theirs. The result isn’t just a vehicle; it’s pride of ownership.

You don’t just drive a Mini. You feel something about it. And that feeling is the essence of hospitality.

I thought about my air travel experiences: As a longtime customer of American Airlines. How I feel safe, comfortable, I can rely upon them to traverse my experience from A to B. I think about the ease of my travel experience, how they treat me as a frequent flyer. I think about the oasis the AA lounges provide me.

You don’t just fly with your favorite airline; you build trust and loyalty as a repeat customer.

Hospitality in the Workplace

The workshop itself was focused on employee experience design for a prominent financial services firm. As we talked, something interesting happened. The conversation gradually moved away from food, amenities, and perks and toward something much more meaningful: human touchpoints.

Where and what are the moments where we can positively influence how people feel during their workday?

Consider the diversity of needs across a workplace:

A call center operator managing high-pressure conversations and short breaks.
An executive looking for space to think, reflect, and catch up.
A team leader focused on connecting and energizing their team.

Each person arrives at work with very different needs. Each one is seeking an experience that supports their wellbeing, performance, and their emotional state.

And hospitality, in this context, is about recognizing those differences can positively impact the human experience.

One Size Fits Most…or One Size Fits No One?

I also reflected on my own needs at work. While I genuinely appreciate great food, I’ve realized that when I’m busy, simplicity works best for me. A cheese sandwich, a juice, and a coffee in a quiet corner while catching up on emails is often perfect.

Others might prefer something entirely different. For some people, lunch is an elaborate culinary experience and a social moment with colleagues.

For others, the best break might be a bike ride or run, a quick solo workout in the gym, or a quiet space to decompress. And for others still, the highlight might be a group activity: a spinning class, a yoga session, or a collaborative team lunch.

The point is simple: hospitality is deeply personal.

Learning from Apple, Mini and American Airlines

Thinking back to Apple, Mini, and AA: these companies have mastered something that hospitality often struggles with:

Personalization at scale: Apple makes complex technology feel effortless for millions of people. Mini allows customers to express individuality through design and customization. American Airlines builds in reasons to be loyal beyond collecting airmiles.

So, the question becomes:

How can we apply this thinking to our own context of hospitality?

How do we move beyond a “one size fits most” approach and instead create environments that allow individuals to shape experiences around their own needs?

The Future of Hospitality

Perhaps the real opportunity lies in shifting our perspective. Instead of asking:

“What should we provide?”

We might ask instead:

“What moments exist where we can positively influence how someone feels?”

Hospitality isn’t limited to hotels or restaurants. It exists in workplaces, schools and colleges, retail stores, transportation, healthcare settings, and even on digital platforms.

Anywhere humans interact with environments, services, or each other, hospitality has the potential to elevate the experience.

So, What Is Hospitality?

After all the discussion, I’ve come to a simple conclusion:

Hospitality isn’t about food, amenities, or design. It’s about facilitating experiences that positively influence how people feel. Sometimes that’s a beautifully crafted meal. Sometimes it’s a helpful conversation. And sometimes it’s simply a quiet corner with a sandwich, a juice, and a coffee.

What do you think?

How would you define hospitality?
And which organizations, inside or outside the hospitality industry, do you think deliver the best hospitality experiences?

Please add your thoughts and leave a comment below.

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